Chad.

As I recall, I wrote my last post after deciding to go to Cameroon. I made that decision after learning that "essential personnel" could return to Chad. I decided on Cameroon with the understanding that there was a chance Chad would be open again in a few weeks. At that point, I felt like I had been on a roller coaster so long that I really needed to get off. So I emailed all of the right people and told them that Cameroon was my choice.

It felt really good to know what I was doing. I was still kind of hanging on the Chad, I guess, and wishing I could go there, but still, just having a plan was a big relief.

However, that relief didn't last very long. Just a couple of days later, I heard from the doctor in Chad. Adventist Volunteer Services, the organization that I am going through, is accepting volunteers for Chad again. So after a lot more crying and praying and talking to important people, I decided to pursue Chad one more time.

That was like...last week, I think. Now, I'm waiting for a visa to Chad.

It has been very interesting to hear people's reactions when I tell them that I'm going to Chad after all. Some people are thrilled. Some are just relieved that I've finally decided what I'm doing. (Actually maybe not...I don't know). But some people have expressed valid concerns. While I haven't taken the political unrest in that area of Africa very seriously up until this point, the area around Chad is, in fact, quite unstable. I don't really know what to believe about Chad itself, but there could potentially be significant concerns there as well. In addition to that, perhaps of greater relevance to me at this point, is the potential to become extremely sick. Again, I've been aware of that potential all along, but I haven't really taken it too seriously. Chad has lots of malaria, as well as things like typhoid, giardia, tuberculosis, hiv. Those are all diseases that I would really rather not get, incidentally. And I probably won't get most of them. But one never knows.

At this point, I feel that God has opened the door to Chad once again. Because it appears to be open, I have started walking towards it. I don't know if the door will stay open. At this point, I'm not really going to believe that I'm going until I'm there. If the door closes again, I will remove Chad from my list of options for this year. If it stays open, I will go to Chad. I don't know at this point. But I know that God has a plan, and that someday I will realize that I learned a lot through this experience.

In the mean time, if I go to Chad I could theoretically leave next week.

Plan G

Or something like that. It could just as easily be plan E or H... I don't remember. Anyway, the good news is that as of now I have a plan. One that looks fairly promising, in fact.

After waiting to hear whether or not I could go to Chad after all, I finally found out recently that I can't. (Fortunately though, most of the missionaries that were there and had to leave are now returning). I mentioned in a previous post that going to Chad was pretty much my favorite dream. Honestly, it still is. Picking a favorite dream isn't as easy as I thought it might be.

Having said that, I am excited about the other prospects available. And I think that by the time I actually get tot the other side of the world, I'll be crazy excited no matter whether it's my favorite destination or my least favorite. Anyway, plans are currently in the works for Buea Adventist Hospital in Cameroon.

Buea is a small hospital in southern Cameroon, somewhere near both the coast and mount Cameroon. It sounds pretty incredible and gorgeous.

If plans progress at the rate I want them to, I'll be leaving sometime around the middle of November. So here's hoping that this plan will hold out at least until I get to Africa.... :)

Are you a nurse?

I really like that question. A lot. Actually maybe what I like is the answer: yes, I sure am a nurse!

The guy at the FedEx place today asked me if I was a nurse. Then he proceeded to tell me that I don't look old enough to be a nurse. I guess that's a compliment.

It reminded me of one of my very first clinicals in nursing school. One of the nurses looked at me and said, "are you old enough to be in nursing school?" I didn't know there was an age limit.

Anyway, I am old enough to be a nurse. I know that, because they gave me a nursing license. But that's not really the point of this post.... The point of this post is that I'm trying to decide how many I-still-don't-know-where-I'm-going-or-when posts I should write. Maybe this will be the last one. I don't know.

What I do know, is that I want to go to Chad. It seems like every time I come to terms with the fact that I can't go and start trying to get excited about going somewhere else, something changes and I think for a minute or an hour or a day that I might be able to go after all. And then all of the desire that I ever had to go comes back, plus more.

I also know a few other things.... Perhaps the most notable of the things that I know is that sometime, hopefully in the near future, there will be a meeting. And that meeting will determine a few things about Chad. You need to understand, this isn't just one crazy nurse who won't give up her dream of living in the bush. This decision has to do with all of the missionaries who have stayed in Chad or who are in the states waiting to hear whether they can go back. And because of that, this decision could potentially affect the future of the two Adventist hospitals in Chad pretty profoundly.

So I'd appreciate it if you would say a prayer for the meeting, for the missionaries that are still in Chad, for the terrorists in Chad... Whoever you feel like praying for, that would be great. I really want to go to Chad, but more than that, I want to see the medical work that is going on there continue to grow and expand.

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11

"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in [Chad] will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6